45: Last Puzzle Piece?

CHAPTER 45

Last Puzzle Piece!

Ahah! I fooled ya! There’s never a last puzzle piece as the jigsaw of our life is always bigger than we think.

Every time I think I’ve got it all figured out – BOOM! – more puzzle pieces drop in my life-track thanks to new events and personal evolution, and especially the media and everyday insanity.

In fact, I often feel the media is in a conspiracy to make sure we are always confused, anxious and never happy. Never feel complete.

Negativity and Fear are real big sellers. Mucho money makers.

After all, fear and paranoia breed healthy consumerism!

If we only bought what we truly needed, the economic world would collapse. The buck would definitely STOP!

The media has to make us afraid so we’ll buy stuff we don’t need. It’s the Capitalistic thing to do. But! There should be warning, like:

Beware! The TV, the media, the news, the internet info, the politicians, the pharmaceutical sellers and hospitals, the beauty companies and magazines, constantly conflicting medical and healthy advice, et cetera WILL be dangerous to your mental, physical and financial health!

Sure, you may think I may be superficial by wanting to laugh at life as it is, but there is so much to laugh at… it’s also my only way to maintain sanity on this planet.

I actually feel the best shrinks are the intelligent stand-up comedians. They help us see the ludicrousness of the lifestyles that are being shoved on us.

For instance, I hate “Breaking News” on TV.

How often do they break-in just to show us a car chase in some town hours away? OK! So, what do they want us to do about it? Jump in our Bat-copter and zoom down to save the day? What do they want? Why do we need to know this?

I knew I was a Recovering Media Sucker when I just changed channels or clicked “OFF!” because I knew the only ones making money off this were the gasoline companies.

Then, there’s the beauty mags, TV ladies, MTV vixens and Botox babes. Who are those gals appealing to? Men who can’t have them, or women who can’t be them? As I sense it, the only winners are the plastic surgeons and computer artists.

But!

You know you are not a female Media Sucker when you just look at your girl friends, check out the market shoppers and realize no one has hair like the Asian flow in all Pantene commercials, or perfect full lips and teeth like Julia Roberts and Shania Twain, nor are clothes all sold in size one.

It is all Show Biz for a reason. What you show is what you earn. It’s a business to make money off fantasy believers. Unfortunately, it also spurns normal woman and can drive us crazy with angst and grief IF we let it by buying into their illusions, and the fear of never being perfect enough.

And that’s the “skinny” on that.

And guys get self-conned into thinking they are only one sit-up away from enchanting the latest Hottie Du Jour.

It’s a mega-challenge to stay trusting and joyous in a world that targets us with so many false promises, plus media depression and fears.

Like: U must buy our shampoo and you’ll instantly have long Asian hair. Buy our latest machine or video and in 6 weeks you’ll have a perfect body. Buy our beauty cream and you’ll have perfect line-free and acne free skin in a week. But our pill or fad diet and you’ll shrink from 195 pounds down 2 a size 6 dress or less.

Buy! Buy! Buy!

Trust us! Our snake oil elixir is better than theirs!

Then if we buy and it doesn’t work as promised, we think it’s our fault. I’ve noticed that nearly all companies count on how low our self-esteem is so that we’ll believe it’s our fault because the product failed… and we’ll not demand a refund.

Ergo! More stress. More poppycock!

Proof: Have you ever seen so many prescription drug ads for stress, ADD, anxiety, acid reflux and sleeplessness? Not just for adults, but also for kids?

With the Earth becoming an orbiting powder keg, it takes more strength than ever to stay centered on God, luv and joyousness.

Sometimes I think it was easier to be happier when ignorance was bliss.

There ought to be a warning before every media event, breaking bulletin, news update, commercial, beauty and drug ad saying:

Beware! This may be dangerous to your mental health!

Even every outrageous reality show gives us constant on-camera displays of living nervous breakdowns. Hey! They ought to be sponsored by Prosaic. At least they do help us know we’re not as nuts or desperate as we might have thought we were.

Life is getting insaner and insaner.

We can’t escape the madness because wherever we go, we take ourselves with us… travel as far as you want to, but when you land… there you are. And there’s another media blitz, and another genre of fear promos.

I only survive by believing that Laughter is the Best Medicine, and the cheapest. Besides, I can’t afford health insurance… and who gives coverage for media stress?

Years ago, when I had lunch with George Burns, I asked him the secret of his longevity, he said:

“Stay away from people or anything that makes you afraid, always laugh, and do what you love to do, make others happy and you’ll be happy and live long… maybe longer than you want… but it will be long… and you won’t get sick!”

Life… what a hoot! Eh?

* * * * *

I have no doubt that the future is already preparing a new and exciting obstacle course riddled with hurdles to leap and new pieces to fit into place.

Unfortunately, the only glitch with spiritual evolution is the more we live and learn, the more likely we are to flip when we slip.

The harder we’ll hit ourselves over the head yelling: You DUMB BUNNY! Why did you do that to yourself? You know you know better! You should have seen what was coming and not stumbled!

This is not implying ignorance is always bliss, but it often makes time-outs easier.

Perhaps evolving includes learning how not being so hard on ourselves when we backslide.

In fact, I'm sure there's an avalanche waiting at the next bend to smack me in the grace as soon as I finish the last word in this book.

But, what the heavens! As I never met a puzzle I didn't like, I never met a mystery that didn't entice me to solve it.

So who knows? I may be chatting with you soon!

Since the past served ample experience to compute this, I figure the future is bound to be equally generous with questions and hopefully solutions.

Ergo! As I thank my past for giving me the strength to eagerly look forward to the surprise party tomorrow is sure to toss, I sincerely hope this journal has inspired you to do for you what it has done for me, which is to acknowledge:

The most significant State-of-the-Heart Project
you shall ever undertake is YOU!
So, go for it!
Only YOU can create the YOU you want to be!

In signing off, I feel it's time to return to Square Won by reiterating my dedication to everything I create because after completing this book I see it included a lot more people than I originally thought and they all helped me more than I realized. So! I dedicate this book to:

Everyone who loved me,
Everyone who hated me
and everyone who never cared either way.

You all helped to create the challenges I had to overcome so as to make me stronger, you fanned the smoke screens I needed to break through for insight, and whether or not you knew it, you gave me mucho opportunity to learn to love myself.

So how can I be anything but grateful?

Besides, viewing the past with objective appreciation is the best natural grace-lift we can give our spirits. And costs nothing except Letting Go of fear so as to be embraced with love. Letting Go of what was so as to live what is. Plus turning off the news and switching to Comedy Central!

Hey! As a giggle, I'd like to complete my journal with a song I wrote in honor of this ol' incredible Cosmic College of Karmical Knowledge.

To me, it symbolizes my Look, Learn and Let Go So As To Grow Forth concept and my sense of overview on humor regarding this Mad, Sad, Glad, Rad World! It's to be sung to the classical melody used in Alan Sherman’s Camp Grenada spin-off. And, why not a song? As Bacon/Shakespeare said, “The world's a stage”… So! I cannot imagine a more suitable exit than a cheerleading song for what has been, what is, and what is possible. Ergo!

ODE TO OL' CAMP EARTH!

Greetings, Merlin! For what it's worth,
again it's me from ol' Camp Earth!
I know the tour guide said Earth was karmic,
BUT! I didn't know it would be so alarmic!

There are wars here! There's hostility!
Obliteration's a possibility!
Negativity's in the currents!
And the ego fights don't make a wit of soul sense!

Oh, beam me home! I wanna beam home!
Beam me home! I wanna beam home
to where the air holds love to share.

Campers struggle with why they came here!
Always ready to pass the blame here!
They even resist the Truth of God here,
as if Earth and them were accidental pods here!

The Games are constant! The players eager
to beat each other for prizes meager!|
They have forgotten that all are One here
…so in truth there's lust but not a lotta love here!

Oh, beam me home! I wanna beam home!
Beam me home! I wanna beam home
to where the land's worked heart in hand.

BUT! Wait a minute, my Dearest Merlin,
things are a-changin', hearts are unfurlin'
lights are a-turnin' on in Campers.
They're alignin' and not choosin' to be dampers!

Peace is becoming a credibility,
Campers are takin' responsibility!
I think there's hope now! Not end-of-rope now!
I think I'll stay and do a lot more than just cope now!

So! Don't beam me home, dear kindly wizard,
sunny days are clearing through the karmic blizzard!
I wanna stay and see Camp Earth give way…

To light and love soon! To nights with calm moons!
To Campers caring and singing in tune!
And even one day discovering you-ooo
have replaced Geraldo, Leno and Phil Donohue!

Oh, yes there's light at tunnel's end!
I vote to stay and start again!
I'll keep my promise to Master Planners!
But tell them back home:
Keep me tuned-in on the Scanners!

Sooo, Don't beam me home! I wanna stay!
Don't beam me home! I wanna stay!
To write a page in this new age…

Life — What a Hoot! Eh?